I mentioned this week that my television is on for approximately 17 hours a day. I know how this sounds.

Am I actually watching the TV during all of this time? Of course not. I’m not eating bon-bons either.

Do I consider the constant hum of the tube to be “company” throughout the day? Absolutely. Five month olds are not that talkative.

So, until my baby gets older or the weather gets warmer, I’m pretty much stuck on the couch. The television is my connection to the outside world. Spring, where the hell are you?

Want to live a day in my shoes? Begin by waking up between 5:30 a.m. and 6 a.m…

 

1.

We start our day with Disney Junior. I firmly believe that Disney has created some sort of voodoo magic for babies. When Mickey Mouse Clubhouse comes on, Dorothy stops what she’s doing, stares at the TV, and smiles. She absolutely loves it! Five months old and the kid already knows that the Hot Dog Dance is freaking hilarious (especially when her daddy attempts to mimic Goofy).

I’ll pretty much do anything for 10 minutes to myself.

 

2.

I’ve watched the Today show since I was a kid waiting for bus #12. This “tradition” keeps me loyal, but I have to say that the entire show is like watching a train wreck – I can’t pull away.

Where is the news? Since when does Al do anything other than weather? Can no one time the segments correctly? Why do Kathy Lee and Hoda get to drink wine at 10 a.m.?

 

3.

What could be more fabulous than lunch with Clinton Kelly and Stacey London? What Not To Wear. Every day at noon on TLC. I don’t even care that they’re re-runs.

What do you think it would take to have Carmindy come to my house and do my make-up every morning?

 

4.

I’m about 20 years late to this party. Where have I been?!

I had never seen Sex And The City prior to my maternity leave, but I think I’m pretty caught up thanks to E!’s marathon every afternoon.

I would love to be a Carrie, but I’m pretty sure I’m clearly a Miranda. Thoughts?

 

5.

Courtny and I are 26 going on 80, and watch the local news pretty much every evening. This, of course, leads to Nightly News with Brian Williams (my total old man crush). Then, we absolutely have to see Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy.

I’m pretty convinced that I could dominate Wheel of Fortune. Seriously. What does one have to do to get on that show?

Then we go to bed, because we’re old, married, and exhausted.

 

Tell me I’m not pathetic. What shows keep you company all day/night long?